Picture by Jesse Weiler
As the title suggests, the Lord Jesus brought my brother
and friend, Tom Lamb, home recently. Tom
was ready to go home and I’m not sure any of us can be any happier for Tom
knowing that he’s with Jesus now. That’s
not to say we’re all happy not having him here with us. It’s difficult to accept that we won’t be
able to see his warm smile around anymore.
My cousin Tammy, Tom’s wife, now has to go on with life
without her loving husband at her side.
It’s going to seem strange for her trying to assimilate to her daily
routine with Tom’s absence. The comfort
she can take with her is knowing that Tom is waiting for her to join him one
day. And that will be a reunion that
will be celebrated in Heaven.
In a way, some would say morbid, I actually envy Tom. I’m not saying I’m suicidal or anything like
that, but I do believe that Tom is in a place far more wonderful than we can
imagine. In Heaven, there is no pain or
suffering. There’s no sin either. It’s a perfect place.
Some describe Heaven with no sense of imagination. They picture Heaven as being some boring
place with nothing to do but play harps.
Or something similarly. I don’t
believe Heaven is remotely like that.
With Heaven, I don’t think we can use our minds enough to imagine what Heaven
is like. It’s a place where Jesus said
there’d be many rooms. And if Jesus is
in the design of the new Heaven and the new earth, then there’s no doubt it
will be perfect.
I think we can get a sense of what Heaven will be like through
the Bible’s description of the Garden of Eden.
It was a place where God walked with man. There was everything there that man needed to
sustain him. When people think about
paradise with clear, blue waters and sandy beaches and palm trees, that’s
nothing compared to Heaven. I heard
someone say that if you were to take everything that paradise is described like
such as perfect weather, beaches, trees, and so on along with no worries,
cares, or fear, it wouldn’t even scratch the surface. Take all these things, add in perfect
relationships, perfect health, and perfect mind, body, and soul, you still
wouldn’t get close. In fact, take
everything that you ever thought of what Heaven would be like and magnify it a
hundred fold, you might then get close to describing Heaven.
And Heaven is where Tom is.
So where does that leave us? For
one, we’re left with the memories of Tom.
Tom actually did a little more than that by leaving a legacy. He began his life like many of us do such as
living contrary to God’s plan and purpose for his life. He went through rebellious and destructive
behavior. He hurt those close to
him.
However, all of that changed when he surrendered to
Jesus. His life went through an overhaul
as God began to work and soften his heart.
Tom became more concerned for others.
He wanted to make amends and ask for forgiveness for how he hurt those
he loved. After Tom was diagnosed with
cancer, he sat down and wrote a letter with Tammy to be read at his
funeral. In the letter he made mention
of a desire to be forgiven from those he hadn’t had the chance to
reconcile. Despite facing his own
mortality, Tom was still concerned for others.
There’s probably a lot more that could be said regarding
Tom’s conversion. Trying to put it in
words, however, doesn’t seem to be adequate for how Tom impacted all of
us. I didn’t know Tom before
Christ. But I got to know the man that
God was working on and what I witnessed was impressive enough. People were always coming up to Tom, whether
it was at a restaurant, at work, at the store, or walking down the street. Tom made people feel special and he had a
gift of being able to draw them out and show a genuine interest in them. He asked questions and made them feel like he
truly cared about who they were, what they were going through, and how he could
help.
For me, I’m going to miss one of my best friends. It would be naïve of me to think that I was
Tom’s best friend because he had so many close friends, people who loved him
very much. But I didn’t, and still
don’t, have that many close friends. That’s
one of the reasons Tom’s friendship meant the world to me. We talked many times about our
struggles. We confided in each other and
we both knew we could trust each other.
He was a true brother in every sense of the word.
It pains me to think about the future. Not that the future is something to
fear. No, I only realize that over time
my memory of Tom will begin to fade. Not
that I want to forget. I just know how
it is with me. My dad died when I was 16
years old. I’m 44 now and I have only
faint memories of my dad apart from stories other people tell me. The same will happen with my memories of Tom. I suppose one thing I can take from this is
knowing I’ll see him one day again. I
imagine all the good memories will be there when we do meet up and we’ll get to
talk and laugh again just like we used to.
I feel bad for Tammy.
I know this is hard on her. She sometimes
shares her memories using the Caring Bridge website I believe as a means to
help her through the healing process.
Already she has shared with her friends that each day and each event
brings about a set of “firsts” without Tom.
She recognizes all the things that Tom did for her and around the house
that she took for granted. Tom didn’t
let the dust settle as he was one to get things done. But now Tammy has to take on the
responsibility of making sure the work gets done herself. It saddens me to think about how alone she
might be feeling. However, I know she’s
not truly alone.
The amazing thing about Tammy is not that she’s
strong. It’s that she’s willing to show
her weaknesses and her vulnerability.
It’s in her weakness that God shows Himself to be strong. She shares her sorrow and her tears. She allows herself to feel, to mourn, and to
grieve. Often she goes back to Scripture
and shares with all of us the verses that are speaking the loudest and have the
most meaning to her in her life currently.
To some, that may not sound like much.
But in reality, it’s the one thing that is going to help keep her
going. She’s leaning heavily upon Jesus
and that’s where she’s the safest and that’s where she’s going to find the
greatest comfort. I don’t have any
reason to be concerned for Tammy. She’s
in God’s hands and there’s no better place to be.
My wife, Shelby, and I are definitely going to miss all the
fun times we had with Tom and Tammy. Tom
was still making plans with Shelby the last time we visited Iowa to see
him. He talked about riding four
wheelers (ATVs) out in east Tennessee.
We had talked many times in the past how we would get together at the
Creation Museum and even go snowmobiling up in Wisconsin. Now I suppose the next time we see Tom there
are going to be far more exciting adventures than the plans we dreamed up here
in this life. And, I know, that is yet
in the future.
But Tom’s home right now.
And all of us have to continue the journey. If there’s something to take from this that
stands out is that life is short. We’re
not guaranteed a tomorrow. Not to make a
cliché out of this but it’s true, we need to make the most out of the life
we’ve been given. The trick is to know
what that means. Tom figured it
out. I believe he knew it was “Love God
and love people.” That simple. Well, the message is simple. I have a hard time living it out myself. But that’s the goal. Love the Lord your God with all your heart,
soul, mind and strength. And love your
neighbor as yourself. All the laws and
the prophets hang on these two commands. (Mark 12:30)
I hope we all can live out our lives with that grand
purpose. Maybe, like Tom, we can finish
the race knowing that we’ve done everything we could to love God and love
people. Then maybe the memories of Tom
will not fade away so much as it will spur us on as we live purpose-filled
lives, like Tom, for Jesus.
